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Rick: "You find the Mimic God!"

Rick: "Who would pay 500 gold for this? What is this, Antiques Roadshow? 'This was in my grandma's dungeon.'"

Tyler: "Whenever I'm like 'It's dim in here,' you guys are like, 'I take out 40 sun rods and put them on my ears and stuff!'"

Tyler: "You make me look up the rules to enforce them, and that's supposed to punish you?"
Rick: "Well, we have to wait."

Jessie: "I have a yacht in my bedroom."

Brian: "I look for traps and monsters and things."
Rick: "You're a terrible houseguest."

Jessie: "Is he that one guy from that one episode of Star Trek?"
Tyler: "How many episodes of Star Trek are there?"
Brian: "How many 'one guy's are there?"

Tyler: "It's a fence, but the kind of fence you put in the water."
Rick: "To keep the fish off your lawn?"

Tyler: "A lightning bolt comes down and hits her."
Jessie: "Do you want to join my metal band? Because that was pretty cool."

Tyler: "Don't spray locusts into the wind."