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Professor Chamberlain: "I'll be interrupting you like the Supreme Court."

Professor Chamberlain: "If you're a writer, you probably have a lot of time."

Student: "I think that's just to show that he's dead now and can't do anything."

Professor Chamberlain: "I love that word, because it's so close to the word 'piss.' You just get a joy out of saying it -- well, some people do."

Professor Chamberlain: "I'll show you, Will Strunk!"

Professor Chamberlain: "You'd better write that down. It will appear later in your tests. In your dreams."

Professor Chamberlain: "Words sound better in a foreign language."

Student 1: "Real authors have no pride."
Student 2: "That's not true! They have nothing but pride!"

Professor Chamberlain: "Just like the deer in the headlights, or is it the squirrel?"

Professor Langman: "We can put a foot in that pie as well."