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Rick: "It's not your neck that I'm concerned about, it's your body odor."
Brian: "I'll have you know that halfling body odor is a prized aphrodisiac across the country."

Tyler: "Yeah, he starts to walk into the sunset and turns into a vampire."

Amanda: "Turn it off and turn it on again. IT Man."

Rick: "One pentagram wasn't enough -- we need two in this bitch."

Jessie: "You can make a saving throw."
Brian: "I make it."
Jessie: "You're no longer a halfling."
Brian: "I'm really an otyugh. 'Blegh.'"
Tyler: "On a wall. 'Blegh!'"

Brian: "Eat math!"

Casey: "The storm lord goes: 'Moo.'"

Jessie: "You are the one who will be back for more! For more death!"

Jessie: "So where can I go that I can see him?"
Brian: "Nowhere. You're blind."

Jessie: "You all tell some terrible stories. I am considering crawling into that pit and killing myself."
Brian: "This is much safer!" (Snaps own neck)