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Jessie: "Go on, shtand up. I dare you!"
Rick: "He stands up."
Jessie: "Oh, shit!"

Jessie: "I can kick him and make him heal back by eleven."

Tyler: "There's a guy in the corner bleeding."
Casey: "I go look at the chest."

Tyler: "Either the person there is you, or you're walking hand in hand with a vampire."

Rick: "I was trying to capture these rats and put them in a pokeball so I could summon them later. They agreed as long as I beat them in a game of riddles. But I lost, and they tried to put me in a pokeball. They're very smart rats. I was winning until they started asking about math."

Rick: "I wear hide."
Jessie: "Hippie."
Rick: "I got this from a baboon."
Tyler: "He wanted twelve bananas for it."
Brian: "You've got this big red butt in the middle of your chest."
Rick: "It's a conversation piece."
Tyler: "But in this case, instead of a conversation starter, it's a conversation ender."

Tyler: "You can just do jumping jacks all night, but it will have consequences."
Rick: "You'll look like an idiot."

Tyler: "You hear a voice very far off as if it is behind you."
Rick: "It says, 'I am behind you.'"

Jessie: "Paladins don't hear whispers."
Tyler: "Well, they do, they just say, 'Look both ways before crossing the street. Pick up your litter. Recycle.'"

Amanda: "There's a penis if you're offended by that."
Brian: "That's less offensive than Uma Thurman's feet."