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Tyler: So, long story short, murder is Plan B.

Orion: Mommy? Sometimes my boogers taste like macaroni and cheese but with extra cheese.

Arthur: Yes, I can count by tens all the way to your face.

Sam: Inspiration to Orgil for his perfectly adequate eulogy.

Tyler: "Oh, I wanted to subdue you," he says to her severed head.

Sam: What if you pickled your donut?
Brian: Ew. I think that's chaotic evil, and paladins would come and kill you.

Tyler: "I could create a 5-foot doughnut and make it real."

Ian: If you get me a dragon, I will put you on the deed.

Tyler: Spoiler alert: he's not a very good maid. But he will drink all your beer.

Casey: She's a planeswalker. She can roll her eyes.