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Jessie: I can't decide if it's cannibalism or not!
Brian: No, it's not. We're different species.

Brian: "Do we have any explosives?"
Tyler: "If we had explosives, we would have used them long ago."

Sam: "I don't know what you're talking about. I'm immortal."
Tyler: "Yeah, but you go through healing potions like Gatorade."

Tyler: Popsicles are not usually made from bread.

Tyler: "Godspeed you crazy arachnid."
Sam: "Don't forget, we all believe in you."

Brian: "I need to stop off at our inn so I can make a 5-foot-long tasty treat. Like a breadstick or something. A candy cane."

Tyler: "So, do you want to go raid the Hall of Evil Slavers Who Apparently Have a Bunch of Magic Items?"

Tyler explaining why the party should sell an emerald: "If you want something green, I'll buy you some green paint."

Cesar: "Now I can beat the crap out of you! When I find you."

Cesar: "This is for turning my friend into a vampire."
Tyler: "I could turn you, too, and you can join him."
Cesar: "Who told you I wanted to be a vampire? Being a vampire sucks!"